While I can honestly say, I see myself in many of those attributes, there are several I lack in...but today, I got a new viewpoint and the final push I needed to change some things as well.
I realized, this is a "perfect or ideal" woman...and I am far from that, but I can strive to make my life, the life God wants it to be...to have no action be wasted on things of this world, but to be used for God's glory, honor and praise.
After we got back home from church, I started pulling books off the shelf, that I had purchased, with all intents of reading and studying and my "in plain English" Bible and then pulled out my notebook and said "Today is the day...the day I start to come closer to you Lord. I am ready, I am willing...to be Your servant and have my life be one that glorifies you."
In my pile was this book pictured to the right "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World" by Joanna Weaver. This falls right along with being the Proverbs 31 woman (where Martha is concerned), but also being a true follower and servant of Christ. Within the first chapter I had tears falling on my cheeks, I was humbled and I felt that I walked away from the greatest part of my life...and almost 9 years later...I can finally come back home.
I wanted to share a few things from each chapter with each of you, because I feel that sometimes, as a parent of a child who is critically ill, special needs or just plain busy, we forget to make time for the one person who is holding us together...the one allowing us to go hours away from home and family for therapies and treatments, the one showing us what unconditional love really means and the one allowing us just one more day with our children.
Easier said than done right? The hardest part to learn is to be available...make the time to pray, read your Bible, listen to a sermon online, participate in a Bible Study (I hear there are great ones online too) and just fellowship with God. Mary was available...she was eager to learn, eager to give herself entirely that all the tasks "that had to be done," were minor in the grand scheme of things. They were urgent tasks, but they were not important tasks.
There is a time to work and a time to worship ~ being a mother under "normal" circumstances is a 24/7 job in itself. Being the mother of a sick, injured or special needs child makes a mother wish for a clone, 48 hours in a day and lots of caffine! Even in the hardest, darkest and uncertain moments, you have to be able to step out of the chaos and into the serenity of worship. Otherwise, you will be like Mary who breaks when the storm hits (the death of Lazarus). Your children need you to be strong when they cannot, to tell them God is in control ~ and mean it, to show your children that while this isn't what childhood should be like, God is going to use them for a much greater purpose.
I will leave each of you with this verse, it is one I remember having to recite in Awanas growing up, but one I let slip through the cracks of my mind since then...and the one that brought me to my knees tonight in tears.
Jesus said: " Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
God Bless each of you and your families,